You know that thing when you want to scream from top of your lungs “I just wanna die already” but you can’t because everyone would freak out and you’d ruin their day?
The thing is – you don’t wanna really do it, you just want someone to pay attention and hear you out, hear about how you feel and help you somehow so you don’t feel that way any more. That sadness that just tires you oh so much…. perhaps would give you a rest.
You just want someone to be there, empathise with you and make you feel you are not a burden to them no matter how long it takes you to get all that crap out of you head.
Am I right? Am I? – You know I am.
But there is no one there. Not a single person will understand you. If you do force it on them, you’ll lose your credibility (if you ever had any). If you don’t force that talk, you are going crazy. Then you think you could post some subliminal crap on Facebook and the right person would read between the lines:
“Life is shit”
“So tired of this hurricane in my head”
“I just want to end it all”
“Why is nobody listening?”
“I need help!”
And what if you don’t get any attention? Like, no reaction, no comments, nothing?
That’ll make you feel even worse. Then you think to yourself … “How can I say I am depressed but make it sound funny?”
Ok, let’s say you do make it funny. You do couple of ‘ha has’ and if you are lucky one of those ‘are you okay?’. Then what? – You’ll say something cryptic like “Ah, you know, life…” and that will be the end of it.
So what have you accomplished? – Nothing.
Why? – Because nobody cares.